Predatory tank

[Femalefishkeeper]

Lots of misunderstandings in this thread.

You asked for any advice. You got advice.

And I didn’t ask you? Please just keep you, you made it worse for me. I asked to be friend with the other person and they agreed. What does that have to do with you? I just want advice, not to feel bullied by random people who think they have more experience than me

 

[JuiceBox52]

Nobody here is bullying you. And it’s a public forum. You basically asked everyone

 

[Femalefishkeeper]

Nobody here is bullying you. And it’s a public forum. You basically asked everyone

About a colour of one fish?? Not anything else

 

[Rocky998]

I don’t see how “the elephant in the room” is advice. I just wanted to know about the colour of one fish, I don’t understand why other things and other people got brought in to it?

If someone sees a concern, we try to be a friend by helping you notice and address it. A lot of us have a ton of experience.
There are members here with 50+ years experience behind them in keeping fish. They share their experience with people here to  HELP.

I know others are avoiding saying, and I would as well but you have been the one not being very kind to be honest towards the members helping you.
We use metaphors when trying to be friendly at times. And "elephant in the room" is just something used at times...
They were not disregarding your main question and they were not being rude.

It was a HUGE learning curve for me when I joined. I questioned a few things to learn more but I never dissed what they had to say. It was all important.
And if you already know the knowledge being provided, you can always be respectful and say thank you and that you already know.

My main point: When a thread is started some members may notice other things BESIDES the main point and address that cause they feel its more important.
Take it as a member trying to help you and not someone being rude. They sincerely just want you to succeed

 

[Femalefishkeeper]

If someone sees a concern, we try to be a friend by helping you notice and address it. A lot of us have a ton of experience.
There are members here with 50+ years experience behind them in keeping fish. They share their experience with people here to  HELP.

I know others are avoiding saying, and I would as well but you have been the one not being very kind to be honest towards the members helping you.
We use metaphors when trying to be friendly at times. And "elephant in the room" is just something used at times...
They were not disregarding your main question and they were not being rude.

It was a HUGE learning curve for me when I joined. I questioned a few things to learn more but I never dissed what they had to say. It was all important.
And if you already know the knowledge being provided, you can always be respectful and say thank you and that you already know.

My main point: When a thread is started some members may notice other things BESIDES the main point and address that cause they feel its more important.
Take it as a member trying to help you and not someone being rude. They sincerely just want you to succeed

I do take in what you are all saying, but I don’t have 50 + years experience. I joined this site thinking that other fish keepers could help me. I asked a question about one fish and had every other bit of information that I put out questioned, with other people joking in against me as well.

I just wanted to speak to other people who keep fish who could help me, not criticise.

You can be used to being tested a certain way but I am not yet. It’s not going to be very appetising to other new fisj keepers if they are being torn down by people who are just meant to help.

I just want you to see my side of the story to, I feel that I wasn’t rested very fairly and instead of me being torn down yet again my point of view should be seen equally, not downgraded because an ‘experienced member” disagrees with me.

Disagreements aren’t the end of the world, it’s how you handle them that determines whether you are right or wrong. It was going well until other people got involved

 

[JuiceBox52]

Yes you asked about the color of your fish, but that was not in this thread. This thread you asked for general advice. It was given, and you got upset. It was given in a non degrading way, and nobody has been bullying you or saying you are wrong for any way of keeping fish. You have not been put down or discouraged from the hobby by anyone here.
The question about your fish, that you are upset about, was in a different thread. Not this one. It’s a separate conversation, and anyone reading THIS thread, will not answer that question because it’s not the place, and not where that question was asked.

We all want you to succeed in this hobby, and are here to help. Nobody is putting you down. Nobody is joking against you. We have not made light of the situation.

 

[Rocky998]

I will just need advice here and there, any advice would be massively appreciated.

These are your words quoted above... Not mine

People listened and gave you "any advice".
They were being helpful and no one was joking and if someone was please quote it so we can see what you mean...
I missed that if so...

but I don’t have 50 + years experience.

Exactly, but I was saying some here do...

 

[Rocky998]

Yes you asked about the color of your fish, but that was not in this thread. This thread you asked for general advice. It was given, and you got upset. It was given in a non degrading way, and nobody has been bullying you or saying you are wrong for any way of keeping fish. You have not been put down or discouraged from the hobby by anyone here.
The question about your fish, that you are upset about, was in a different thread. Not this one. It’s a separate conversation, and anyone reading THIS thread, will not answer that question because it’s not the place, and not where that question was asked.

We all want you to succeed in this hobby, and are here to help. Nobody is putting you down

What she said ^^^

 

[connorlindeman]

And I didn’t ask you? Please just keep you, you made it worse for me. I asked to be friend with the other person and they agreed. What does that have to do with you? I just want advice, not to feel bullied by random people who think they have more experience than me

This is a public forum.

 

[WhistlingBadger]

OK, everybody.

Femalefishkeeper, you did say "Any advice would be massively appreciated." General advice was asked; general advice was given.
"And I didn't ask you?" Yes, you actually did. This is indeed a public forum. We point out problems as we see them. If you already knew that your fish would ultimately prove incompatible and too big for your planned tank, that's wonderful; no harm done. No one is bullying or trying to pick on you. Someone simply pointed out a potential problem in your tank. It's one of the things we do for each other. You are welcome to take such advice for whatever you think it is worth

To everybody else, obviously FFK doesn't appreciate unsolicited advice. At this point I suggest we all...

 

[connorlindeman]

To everybody else, obviously FFK doesn't appreciate unsolicited advice. At this point I suggest we all...

Why did you have to bring back all the bad memories of my younger cousins watching that movie every. single. day.

 

[Rocky998]

Why did you have to bring back all the bad memories of my younger cousins watching that movie every. single. day.

Let it gooo let it goooooooo

 

[Ichthys]

I don’t see how “the elephant in the room” is advice. I just wanted to know about the colour of one fish, I don’t understand why other things and other people got brought in to it?

No you did not. Read your own posts, for God’s sake and stop embarrassing yourself. They’re your posts, we shouldn’t need to tell you what you wrote in them. Get a grip Karen. You won’t make a lot of friends here with your ungrateful childish attitude. Me included. I’m out.

 

[Ichthys]

I did my research,

And what did that entail? I assume you read many times about how Alligator Gars are illegal to own in the UK. I bet they didn’t tell you that at Pier. As a responsible aquarist, I’ve notified DEFRA.

 

[Rocky998]

No you did not. Read your own posts, for God’s sake and stop embarrassing yourself. They’re your posts, we shouldn’t need to tell you what you wrote in them. Get a grip Karen. You won’t make a lot of friends here with your ungrateful childish attitude. Me included. I’m out.

The issue was already resolved. I don't think making comments like this will resolve anything... You being mad at this situation won't solve anything. You're beating a dead horse.

And what did that entail? I assume you read many times about how Alligator Gars are illegal to own in the UK. I bet they didn’t tell you that at Pier. As a responsible aquarist, I’ve notified DEFRA.

I don't think that was the right thing either. You could have waited until she knee it was wrong to keep them... You don't know how she got her hands on one. Sometimes pet store will illegally sell fish. Knowingly or not.

Now you are coming across as rude and not helping your standpoint on this situation