Feeling depressed....not really doing much with the tank

[TheTenthDoctor]

So....I've begun to loose interest in the fish. Its upsetting, fish are such a big part of my life yet now I feel apathetic, I haven't been keeping up with my tanks and sort of letting things drift. Not really learning anything new, and just not doing anything. How do I get out of this slump? Please help....

 

[Colin_T]

road trip like @JuiceBox52 did
spend time outdoors and get some sun, hard to do in winter in the US
exercise to produce serotonin and makes you feel good.
reduce the number of fish in the tank so they don't need as much maintenance and let them go wild for a bit.

 

[Crispii]

Maybe take a break from the hobby, that's what I did when I started high school. I got really interested in fish when I was young, keeping them throughout middle school, that is until, when I started high school. I just lost interest, that is until I reached my Senior year is when I started to become interested thanks to Youtube.

In the meantime, just focus on something that makes you happy. Maybe find a new hobby or hang out with friends and family. Perhaps later down the road, you'll find the fishkeeping hobby interesting again.

 

[JuiceBox52]

I've gone in and out of lulls in my fishkeeping, I seem to always come out of it eventually.
Tank related, maybe rescape your tank, buy new and different plants, and maybe even rehome your current fish and change up the stocking.
General life wise, spend time outdoors! I cannot stress how important it is, even when it's cold be outside a little every day, it helps me a lot

 

[PlasticGalaxy]

Lots of us have had to face this, you're not alone.

A few months ago, I felt this way as well. Points where I'd get so frustrated with sitting inert and not doing anything, I wanted to tear down my tank and get rid of all my fish; struggling to do basic maintenance; and getting upset with myself even just looking at my tank. At one point my tank went ages without any amount of water being changed, and the filter hadn't been cleaned for months. It's hard to do in that state, especially if you've also got other things to do. When I started work, it consumed me and by the time I got home in the evenings, I had no time; I was so fed up with being awake that I just wanted to collapse on my bed and have someone else take care of it all for me.

Unfortunately it took me a while to come up with a quick solution -- A few months ago, I realised (probably a little late) that my water changes didn't have to be 20-40% all in one day: I could spread it over a few days in the week. I'd designate two or three days to do it, and do half - or even a quarter - of the full amount in one day, and then the rest on other days. It made the workload feel far more manageable than it had done, and it made me feel less hopeless.

Using this forum more actually made me feel more motivated, too. I'd taken a break from around June to November, and that was where I was the least inspired. Seeing the beautiful tanks on here and how knowledgeable some are on all different subjects made me feel like I could get back into it and do something impressive. Honestly, I felt so inadequate compared to some people here, I dug myself out of the pit I'd fallen into just to prove I was better than them. Petty, I know, but it gave me a reason to push myself forward.

Another thing that works for me is getting really stuck into YouTube channels, articles, discussions, e.t.c. on fish you really like. For me, it was plecos: the size some grow to, the vast array of colours, every species imaginable, biotopes and so much more is just so fascinating to me. Being autistic, my special interests and hyperfixations tend to propel me into a state of total focus with things like this, so much so that it outshines any negativity I feel in a day. Anything that distracts me becomes more powerful that how bad I've been feeling.

 

[Rocky998]

Im feeling this way and I dont even have fish in my tank LOL... I think its cause I finished cycling a while back but then the cycle broke as I was waiting to get fish... So, now on the 78th day of cycling... Im bored, but I keep reminding myself that once I get fish I will be so much more happy

 

[Rocky998]

Another thing that works for me is getting really stuck into YouTube channels, articles, discussions, e.t.c. on fish you really like. For me, it was plecos: the size some grow to, the vast array of colours, every species imaginable, biotopes and so much more is just so fascinating to me. Being autistic, my special interests and hyperfixations tend to propel me into a state of total focus with things like this, so much so that it outshines any negativity I feel in a day. Anything that distracts me becomes more powerful that how bad I've been feeling.

same

 

[vanalisa]

Hiya Doc,

I've definitely gone through this.
More than once. You can tell by looking at the times that I disappeared from the form for a while. You haven't been on here as much lately, I noticed because you commented on something recently.

I experienced a lot of guilt about not keeping up with my tanks like I should. That's actually about all I did during those times was my water changes.
It would be where I would just have one day that I would take care of my tanks, all of them. It was exhausting and it would really take ALL day.

One thing I did when it got really bad was to talk to someone at my local fish store about what would happen if I needed to rehome my fish. You can do this if you have a local fish store, and you can also find online groups in your area. To be totally honest, I started poke around the forum to see who lives close to me in case I had to find someone to re-home my fish to. I figured I could drive a few hours if I had to. I can't remember if I actually reached out to anybody here on the forum, but I know who you are, , even if you don't!

After I found out that it would be pretty easy to find homes for my fish I somehow felt reassured. It felt like I was responsible, and somehow this helped me to take care of my tanks.

I think a big part of it was worrying about what would happen and once I realized that there was a solution I began to relax a little bit more about it.

Just manage the water changes, for the sake of the fish, and let the rest do what it will. If you're struggling with depression find a counselor to talk to. PM myself or someone else on the forum.

Several people have talked about exercise and going outside. The hard part is when you're depressed you don't want to do anything. If you can manage to go outside it will help. If you can, sit down directly on the Earth. You can also put your palms flat on the ground. The Earth will draw out the funk.
You will feel lighter and then you can go inside and tackle those water changes!

Thanks for sharing and opening up the dialogue. As you can see you're not alone.

 

[JuiceBox52]

Hiya Doc,

I've definitely gone through this.
More than once. You can tell by looking at the times that I disappeared from the form for a while. You haven't been on here as much lately, I noticed because you commented on something recently.

I experienced a lot of guilt about not keeping up with my tanks like I should. That's actually about all I did during those times was my water changes.
It would be where I would just have one day that I would take care of my tanks, all of them. It was exhausting and it would really take ALL day.

One thing I did when it got really bad was to talk to someone at my local fish store about what would happen if I needed to rehome my fish. You can do this if you have a local fish store, and you can also find online groups in your area. To be totally honest, I started poke around the forum to see who lives close to me in case I had to find someone to re-home my fish to. I figured I could drive a few hours if I had to. I can't remember if I actually reached out to anybody here on the forum, but I know who you are, , even if you don't!

After I found out that it would be pretty easy to find homes for my fish I somehow felt reassured. It felt like I was responsible, and somehow this helped me to take care of my tanks.

I think a big part of it was worrying about what would happen and once I realized that there was a solution I began to relax a little bit more about it.

Just manage the water changes, for the sake of the fish, and let the rest do what it will. If you're struggling with depression find a counselor to talk to. PM myself or someone else on the forum.

Several people have talked about exercise and going outside. The hard part is when you're depressed you don't want to do anything. If you can manage to go outside it will help. If you can, sit down directly on the Earth. You can also put your palms flat on the ground. The Earth will draw out the funk.
You will feel lighter and then you can go inside and tackle those water changes!

Thanks for sharing and opening up the dialogue. As you can see you're not alone.

I agree it is DEFINITELY hard to go outside and be active with depression. it helps so much though

 

[Colin_T]

Im feeling this way and I dont even have fish in my tank LOL... I think its cause I finished cycling a while back but then the cycle broke as I was waiting to get fish... So, now on the 78th day of cycling... Im bored, but I keep reminding myself that once I get fish I will be so much more happy

78 days of cycling?

Drain the tank. Refill it with dechlorinated water. Let it run for a few days. Add some fish.

 

[Rocky998]

78 days of cycling?

Drain the tank. Refill it with dechlorinated water. Let it run for a few days. Add some fish.

My cycle broke... A while back... Ive been fixing it

 

[Colin_T]

Stuff it, there will be some bacteria in there. Drain, refill, wait 2 days, add fish. Don't feed too much for a month and away you go.

 

[Rocky998]

Stuff it, there will be some bacteria in there. Drain, refill, wait 2 days, add fish. Don't feed too much for a month and away you go.

Yah, well I just added 3ppm ammonia yesterday and this morning its at 0.25 and nitrites are at 5ppm+ so no, I want to make sure my tank can get at least 2ppm ammonia processed.

 

[vanalisa]

Calling @TheTenthDoctor
Yoohoo !

 

[WhistlingBadger]

Yeah, I've been there, too. There's a time to persevere and a time to take a break. If you decide the latter, it's OK--this is a hobby, not a lifelong commitment. But stick around the forum, either way. We enjoy hearing from you.
T