Family Problems Concerning The Tank

[ammer]

I didn't know where else to post this, besides "New to the Hobby," but I'm not necessarily new. I've had my tank for a few years, however I am generally uninformed. I blame myself.

I have a cry for help from you guys, regarding my family. They are even more uninformed about fish than I am, except they dont take the time to ask people that can help them. They do whatever they want.

My grandmother has this annoying habit of buying the fish she wants to buy, and putting them in the tank when I'm not home. It's supposed to be a "family" tank, but it's been in my room ever since we got it. I've even moved rooms. Usually I can handle what she throws at me, some bumblebee gobies or a chinese algea eater, but every now and then she assumes you can throw ANY freshwater fish into my community tank and it'll live. The big problems have been an african chiclid, who ate up most of my fish before we gave him to my uncle with a 55+ tank, and now my problem is a goldfish.

She thinks it's an insult when I tell her she can't just put fish in like that. She goes on about how she pays for stuff too, and this and that, and it's not that I dont want her to buy what fish she wants... she just needs to stop throwing ANY fish into the tank. If I were to take the fish back, she'd probably be offended too. I don't really know what to tell her, and I'm not even an expert.

My mother has this annoying habit of feeding my fish while I'm gone. She thinks I must be starving them by only feeding them once a day, so every now and then I'll come home with food my fish won't even eat in the tank, like some old Betta food still sitting in my cupboard thing, or some goldfish flakes. Once, my little 2 year old sister wasn't being watched and she dumped and entire can of fish food into my tank.

My family's sort of destroying what tank I can hardly pull together, and I dont know how to tell them to stop without them being totally turned off from fishkeeping altogether. Any suggestions as to what I can do, or say? I'm about to put a padlock on the tank lid.


Sorry about that book, but I have another quick question. How can you get nitrates down? I have a conditioner with stuff thats supposed to help nitrates, but so far no good. My faucet water's nitrate readings are about 0ppm, whereas my tank nitrate readings are 40+. I think I might give up on this hobby soon

 

[*Fishkies*]

Awe ....well try like to lock your food up somehow or hide it in a closet or behind things in a closet if you have your own.

Also put the food away that the fish do not need or they will not eat. So that way there are not foods out that the fish should not have.

If you could you could try to find a spare tank like from second-hand, and tell your grandma or whoever buys new fish to put them in that tank first before they add them directly to your new tank.

Also you probably have high nitrates because fish are always being added to the tank.


Best of luck with your situation!!!

 

[ammer]

Awe ....well try like to lock your food up somehow or hide it in a closet or behind things in a closet if you have your own.

Also put the food away that the fish do not need or they will not eat. So that way there are not foods out that the fish should not have.

If you could you could try to find a spare tank like from second-hand, and tell your grandma or whoever buys new fish to put them in that tank first before they add them directly to your new tank.

Also you probably have high nitrates because fish are always being added to the tank.


Best of luck with your situation!!!

That second tank is actually a really brilliant idea, well of course along with the food.

I havent been adding too many fish recently, it was probably about.. 4+ months? that I hadn't added fish, because.. well, I was waiting for them to die out. Feeding and caring for them, of course, but I was really close to calling it quits with the tank. I still almost am.

Thanks for the advice!

 

[Tolak]

What usually works with people like that is trying to relate the situation they don't understand to one they do. They obviously don't understand fish, and seem to have no desire to. They may understand a family pet such as a dog or cat, explain that if there are 4,5, or however many people in the house, and they are all feeding the pet twice daily, that the pet is eating 8 or 10 meals daily. This leads to obesity, which is no good for any living thing, including fish.

Try the same method of relating with temperment. Tossing in a new kitten with an adult dog will probably give you a beat up kitty. Putting a pupply in with an adult cat will mean the pup will get the snot slapped out of it. They all breath air, but are not compatable unless properly introduced, and even then at times it's iffy. Fish are the same, with the same compatability issues, the only difference is they live in water.

Overfeeding will increase nitrates, the fish eat more, and produce more waste. The best way to keep nitrates under control is with water changes.

 

[iairj84]

I feel your pain! this is kind of how it was for me when I was younger trying to keep my 10 gallon going well... Although I wasn't probably nearly as knowledgable as you!

I would ask about a second tank... Once your family see's how nice you can keep your own tank they will probably trust you and see that with your help you can keep that tank looking good too!

 

[Clown loach lover]

I would just tell them to but out.

 

[loachman]

best way to lower nitrates is a ~20-30% water change as needed. Live plants will keep it lower in the long run, but can also be an additional headache you probably don't want. 40ppm really isn't that high in a FW tank though that you need to be especially worried, depending on what fish you have. Most fish will do fine. I'd try not to let it get alot higher though.

 

[celaeno]

sounds like your grandmother is just ignorant. i don't think there's a cure for that.

 

[wendywc]

If the tank is in your room, then get a lock and key for your room. Dunno what else to say.

 

[scorphonic]

I have a simple way to deal with this, following on from what was mentioned previously.

Get another, inexpensive, but good sized tank for yourself. If your family want to treat the family tank like that, then let them at it. Your tank will house your fish with your food under your control. Their tank can be left to them to destroy. I'm not condoning the deliberate harming of the poor fish but when they suddenly realise that fish keeping isn't as simple as dumping food in each day then they will or should be happy to hear what you have to tell them.

Your grandmother is acting the very same way most ignorant* adults would. Tell her to have the family tank, and begin to enjoy and learn about the tank that you own.

*: ignorant to the needs and requirements of fish, this is what I mean here.

 

[Canis-Equus]

I think a combination of the above ideas......

As Tolak says, explain using terms they will understand..... would they chuck a human child in with a bunch of gorillas? The two species are related, they are both mammals they both breath air..... but disaster would occur if you put the two together!


Lock up all the food - except, get an old food tub and put a TINY pinch in there. Leave that out. If you dont leave anything out you risk them buying some more, possibly inappropriate food and throwing that in, or finding some household stuff and chucking that in instead.

Invest in a bigger filter or a second filter, over filter the water wil help it stay cleaner.

Do lots of water changes to keep the quality better.

You could make up a list of the fish in there, and fish you dont have that are compatible with those, and ask them nicely to only add fish on that list.

Now you really cant stop them chucking any old fish in if they fancy doing that, and if explaining to them in terms they may understand doesnt work, then you have to show them you know better.....

So as scorphonic says.....

Set up another tank, your own tank. You do exactly what you want with it and make it clear, your tank, your rules, you pay for it, no one interferes and threaten them, anything shows up in there you didnt buy, goes down the toilet (you wont really DO that, but tell them thats how it is!).

Since you will do your research and do things properly, in barely any time at all you will have a stunning looking tank..... they will have a crummy one. Unless they are completely and utterly blind, they will see that yours is better and perhaps pay some attention to you.

Lots of work for you but it might work!

 

[Discus Breeder]

Sorry about that book, but I have another quick question. How can you get nitrates down?

Water changes, water changes and more water changes. With the overfeeding and the addition of more fish than should be in there water changes of 50% every other day should start lowering that very high Nitrate reading.