Why All The Comments About How Wrong Someone Does It?

[sylvia]

Speaking purely for myself here - if I see a post, I don't normaly know anything about the person who's posted. Especialy if it's someone who's new (though I check how many posts people have before I reply and I try to be gentler with 'newbies'). I have no way of telling how much they know about the fish they are keeping or what their own views are on the subject at hand. If I notice something's wrong with their setup (like having a bala in an undersized tank like you said), I have to tell them. Many times the person already knows - but sometimes they don't. As far as I'm concerned, it's worth inconveniencing a lot of people and forcing them to write a few extra sentences of explanation if it means some people actualy learn something new to their, and their fish' benefit. Now if there are five posts above mine saying the exact same thing, I see no reason to be repetitive - I don't want to inconvenience myself writing a couple of extra sentences

 

[raptorrex]

To be fair, the person was asking about help in a paying work environment, and as far as im concerned the people who work should not be in a job without appropriate training. I wouldnt let my staff work for me without training thus my responce to the person.

so because he, wanted to get himself some knowledge, before he started his job, he should be treated like that? those comments should have been sent to his boss! it is no more than self-righteous, bullying. IMO. that may be the way you think, but the comment is made as if it is a fact. and fact it most certainly is not!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Cheffi]

To be fair, the person was asking about help in a paying work environment, and as far as im concerned the people who work should not be in a job without appropriate training. I wouldnt let my staff work for me without training thus my responce to the person.

so because he, wanted to get himself some knowledge, before he started his job, he should be treated like that? those comments should have been sent to his boss! it is no more than self-righteous, bullying. IMO. that may be the way you think, but the comment is made as if it is a fact. and fact it most certainly is not!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm sorry to say this but I really don't think it's good manners to have a post mortem and rake over old threads that you have a beef about on someone else's thread. Imho.

 

[ImperfectFaerie]

Honestly, when you come to a forum to ask questions you should expect to get varied replies. Everyone's experiences are different and it's up to you to do the research and put together what you feel confidant with. Yes, some people have been rude, but by far I feel like it's not rudeness- it's the simple fact that it is near impossible to put the tone of voice into the message. One sentence read by 10 different people will be percieved 10 different ways. I really think that in general you just need to take things with a grain of salt. If someone's blatently an ass- ignore it. Not worth your time to stress out over. It's really not that hard to scroll down and get past someone who isn't trying to be helpful. Just my .02

 

[raptorrex]

To be fair, the person was asking about help in a paying work environment, and as far as im concerned the people who work should not be in a job without appropriate training. I wouldnt let my staff work for me without training thus my responce to the person.

so because he, wanted to get himself some knowledge, before he started his job, he should be treated like that? those comments should have been sent to his boss! it is no more than self-righteous, bullying. IMO. that may be the way you think, but the comment is made as if it is a fact. and fact it most certainly is not!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm sorry to say this but I really don't think it's good manners to have a post mortem and rake over old threads that you have a beef about on someone else's thread. Imho.

i would agree!
i thought long and hard before i linked it to the thread, but it was a perfect example of the point i was making, and that was on thread. the poster decided to defend his comment. i simply answered!

 

[iroc]

Well the only thing anyone ever said about my tanks was that clown loaches perfer groups ( which I can't do unfornately) but that was well recived advice and that my resuce bala was to big for my tank (which I stated in the post was untrue since he has LOTS of room to grow before I need to rehome him) so I wasn't speaking personaly but more a ponderence about why as ppl we are more likely write something to correct what we feel is a mistake then to say what a nwonderful job someone is doing.

 

[raptorrex]

Well the only thing anyone ever said about my tanks was that clown loaches perfer groups ( which I can't do unfornately) but that was well recived advice and that my resuce bala was to big for my tank (which I stated in the post was untrue since he has LOTS of room to grow before I need to rehome him) so I wasn't speaking personaly but more a ponderence about why as ppl we are more likely write something to correct what we feel is a mistake then to say what a nwonderful job someone is doing.

a point very well made!!!!!

i tend not to post on stocking, unless i have experience of the fish. even then i am careful, coz i don't always follow the rules myself. oops
i never post on emergences as in fish illness as i have never had any experience of them!
i do have a habit of being quit sarcastic to people who i feel are being lazy, questions like what types of shrimp are filter feeders, how big will my fish get and how do i switch on my newly bought second hand (whatever) are IMO answered far quicker, and in more detail with a g??gle search!
lol i mean no offence if the poster reads this, the best one was "can someone post a picture of a sponge filter insert" classic!!!!

 

[OohFeeshy]

Stocking comments, fine. But comments like 'you know you should really get a background for that tank. I reccomend black' when it has a background, as any fool can see, and the reason it's not black is because of light issues etc, or especially things like 'Clean your glass, theres algae/water marks on it' when algae is left for algae eaters and water marks aren't even visible when not using a flash.

 

[Inchworm]

Stocking comments, fine. But comments like 'you know you should really get a background for that tank. I reccomend black' when it has a background, as any fool can see, and the reason it's not black is because of light issues etc, or especially things like 'Clean your glass, theres algae/water marks on it' when algae is left for algae eaters and water marks aren't even visible when not using a flash.

My goodness! One of the members really said those things? They must have been pretty nice tanks if that's all someone found to pick on.

But seriously, it would be better if everyone remembered when they post an answer, that there is a real live person, sitting at another computer somewhere, just wanting a little human contact and a comment about their fish. A rude answer can hurt.

 

[joloco]

well said - it doesn't hurt anyone to be nice to people even if you have the upmost contempt for their setup / actions
besides you never know when that person might turn around have that vital bit of knowledge that you really need - afterall no one knows everything

 

[Chac]

But seriously, it would be better if everyone remembered when they post an answer, that there is a real live person, sitting at another computer somewhere, just wanting a little human contact and a comment about their fish. A rude answer can hurt.

Fair point Inchworm but IMO this forum is way way to friendly & people (in the marine section anyway) seem scared to say anything wrong to other members even if they are killing there livestock

God knows how many Newbies have killed Anemones just through a lack of reasearch, which I find ridiculeous, and if a few stern post help them save there livestcok I see that as more important than a bruised eco

 

[OohFeeshy]

They must have been pretty nice tanks if that's all someone found to pick on.

Heh, I normally make sure to put very clearly why I'm doing things... Even if it involves something blindingly obvious (for instance, I once used an old sea monkeys tank to hold bettas while water changing... someone told me I really should upgrade them, that was far too small for them to live in )

But seriously, it would be better if everyone remembered when they post an answer, that there is a real live person, sitting at another computer somewhere, just wanting a little human contact and a comment about their fish. A rude answer can hurt.

True, but you have to remember this isn't, say, an art forum. This is a fish forum, revolving around fish- living, feeling creatures, and if saving a fish or whatever from a slow death by stunting or being bullied to death, it's worth hurting someones feelings. Chances are, they'll be grateful someone told them.

 

[vancouver]

Some people don't know their tank is overstocked.. it might take posting a picture and getting responses for them to understand why their tank is overstocked....

I know some people just post pics for the looks responses.. but inevitably, if someone sees something wrong with their tank, they gonna get the 'other' comments too.

I'm not directing this at the person that started this topic as I haven't seen their tank.. but if I do see an overstocked tank I probably would be one of the people posting about it.


''Heh, I normally make sure to put very clearly why I'm doing things... Even if it involves something blindingly obvious (for instance, I once used an old sea monkeys tank to hold bettas while water changing... someone told me I really should upgrade them, that was far too small for them to live in laugh.gif)''

LMAO ... THAT WAS ME.. haahahahahhaa

 

[xxBarneyxx]

Personally if someone saw a problem with something I posted I would want them to point it out to me (even if it was a problem I was already aware of).

Its best to do this in public as well as a lot of people (myself included) use these forums to learn from and if someone for example has a Discus in a 10gal tank and nobody says anything about it in public someone who is new to the hobby could see this and think "ahh thats a good idea".

There is a right way and a wrong way of doing this though and its always worth using a little extra tact when posting on forums as sometimes things can be read much differently to how you meant them.

 

[Egmel]

its always worth using a little extra tact when posting on forums as sometimes things can be read much differently to how you meant them.

This should be the take home message today. Punctuation can make a world of difference, as can one of our many smilies.

I fully believe that 'issues' should be raised. On the other hand, if you are posting pics of your tank and you know there is something that someone might pick up on, you can always put in the defence in the first post.

Taking the original example; "One Rescued Bala Shark (Awaiting spangly new home) " would have warded off most comments about him.

So in general I think that tact in replies and forethought in original posts should keep any animosity to a minimum.