Oh My God, My Mom....i Could Have Killed Her!

[Loops]

Had my tanks since Feb and the only involvement my mom has is she turns the light off on my Lotus's tank..my Betta, this one has no timer.

I have been staying at my b/f over the weekend and pop home everyday to check and feed my fish.

Went in today and noticed lots of big flakes of food floating on the top, alot of it, bear in mind I only have endlers and Habrosus in the bigger tank so they are fed very small amounts.
Looks into Lotus's tank and notice the same, and bear in mind he doesn't even eat flake food!!

I run to the other room asking mom who has fed my fish? well she had!!! I couldnt believe it, i went mad because she doesn't undestand what this could do, and she has promised me since day one that she would never feed them!
One of our dogs are over weight through her feeding her love so you can understand why i am annoyed (we always argue about the overweight dog because i think its cruel

So i did a big water change in both tanks and won't feed them for a couple of days. I have now hidden all the food .

I need to move out, I would if I could afford it

 

[minxfishy]

As annoying as it is to find that when you come home and explaining the reasons not to do it is a good idea, I guess she was just trying to be helpful, dont be too hard on her.

 

[england]

At least she cared enough to help you out, just tell her whats what a show her what you feed them and how much, easy as that,she can learn, you can enjoy teaching something to your mum and spending some family time in the process....sorted

 

[Loops]

Believe me she was not doing it for my benefit!!
I said calmly to her I don't understand why you fed them, she said because they were hungry!

Also my mom know's that I go round every day to feed them so wouldn't have been doing it to help me out.

I suppose all of you wouldn't understand because you do not know my mom but i just needed to tell someone

At least she cared enough to help you out, just tell her whats what a show her what you feed them and how much, easy as that,she can learn, you can enjoy teaching something to your mum and spending some family time in the process....sorted

Ah ok I would but she would never ever listen.

I have explained to her that our little yorkshire terrier is obese and have told her that she is feeding her too much but she sneeks food to her all the time, everyone tells her but she still does it. Even the vet told her that our yorkie has a heart murmur and that he strongly suggests we get the weight off her she just keeps on feeding her!

 

[Tolak]

Some moms are like that, not happy unless everyone & everything are well and almost constantly fed. My grandmother was like that, grew up during the depression, times were really lean. WWII rationing was later in her life. When times are good, food, constantly, eat constantly. Being a kid I didn't mind, she knew how to cook.

Some people think food equals love, probably seems normal to them, but is a real misdirection of energy.

 

[england]

Does she eat alot herself? maybe she has under lying issues herself, how do you get on with her?sounds like your not to happy with her....
Maybe shes unhappy and this way she makes herself feel better

 

[Loops]

Does she eat alot herself? maybe she has under lying issues herself, how do you get on with her?sounds like your not to happy with her....
Maybe shes unhappy and this way she makes herself feel better

Think you are reading far too much into this. My mom and me are atually quite close but she is just stubborn.

And yes she does eat too much herself but has lost all her unwanted weight now.

 

[afishdude]

To be completely honest, she was probably right. If you feed them tiny amounts one time a day they probably were hungry.

 

[england]

ok well was trying to help as you said you needed to tell someone, stuck me as you wanted to chat and seek help....

 

[Loops]

To be completely honest, she was probably right. If you feed them tiny amounts one time a day they probably were hungry.

Oh my god, i came on here for support!

Have you seen how big endlers are!

The endlers have flakes crushed up small and the habrosus have sinking pellets!

ok well was trying to help as you said you needed to tell someone, stuck me as you wanted to chat and seek help....

I know thanks nelly x

 

[afishdude]

To be completely honest, she was probably right. If you feed them tiny amounts one time a day they probably were hungry.

Oh my god, i came on here for support!

Have you seen how big endlers are!

The endlers have flakes crushed up small and the habrosus have sinking pellets!

ok well was trying to help as you said you needed to tell someone, stuck me as you wanted to chat and seek help....

I know thanks nelly x

Yes I have, considering I bred guppies and endlers for 10 years. They are the type of fish that are always going around the tank looking for food. They process the food in a couple of hours and are hungry again. It is advised to feed livebearers 2-3 times daily.

 

[minxfishy]

Does she eat alot herself? maybe she has under lying issues herself, how do you get on with her?sounds like your not to happy with her....
Maybe shes unhappy and this way she makes herself feel better

Think you are reading far too much into this. My mom and me are atually quite close but she is just stubborn.

And yes she does eat too much herself but has lost all her unwanted weight now.

Us mothers, are a law unto ourselves sometimes

 

[gaz gun man]

To be completely honest, she was probably right. If you feed them tiny amounts one time a day they probably were hungry.

always better to under-feed than over-feed.

I only feed about 4 or 5 times a week.

 

[Loops]

Well I have always been told to feed them once and there are really heathly and happy.

 

[Forestpisces]

Sorry to hear about the mishap Loops, i know your a good carer for your fish.

Try and make it clear to your mum that the fish can die from over feeding then tell her how much feed them and why you feed them that much, if anything try make it clear to her that if she doesn't understand your happy to explain but in the meantime no sneaky feeding.

i'm sure things will improve, best of luck.