Not Happy

[jeffnae]

Im fairly new to this forum. And it is probably not my place to say or do anything. But i have to now.
I would like to add some thing to this forum. Some people arent going to agree.
I dont mean to offend or critise anyone or there Efforts..


I have been just reading the forum lately and there is some thing that is really annoying me by others replies.
People add their tanks to this forum so others can appreciate. Where as other members we shall welcome these pictures and not critique them as much as members do. Some times comments are best left off.
I understand that the replies are in the Best interest of the fish. Advising members not Accusing them of basically not knowing anything and that other members are better than them.

When I first joined I recieved pm messages of people saying about What my fish like to eat or do or Who will go with my fish., Groups they shall be in. Bigger tank, Also to be told that i do not have sufficient Filteration. Or bascially not in my tank etc....
Which really P***** me off, These members new nothing about the circumstances of my fish tank, New nothing of me or of MY Fish.. When i replied with something they never replied again.

People are proud of there tanks and their stock only to be critised by others. In a Harsh way.
Our stock of our tanks is what we have been advised from by our LFS. Yes I agree that sometimes they dont tell us all the facts as they just want a sale.. But then it comes down to Research before you buy.. I know alot of members like to advise other members of situations that they have accountered or from what they have seen etc.

Do you think members need to be told by like 3 or more people the same thing... Post after post. Reply after Reply...

Basically to sumarise my post, Members needs to approach other members in a nicier way about the Possible tank situation. Not heavily CRUCIFY others.... Even find out all the facts before you jump to conclusions

 

[Truck]

When I first joined I recieved pm messages of people saying about What my fish like to eat or do or Who will go with my fish., Groups they shall be in. Bigger tank, Also to be told that i do not have sufficient Filteration. Or bascially not in my tank etc....
Which really P***** me off, These members new nothing about the circumstances of my fish tank, New nothing of me or of MY Fish.. When i replied with something they never replied again.

Seems unlikely, your PM centre hasn't been activated yet, you need 30 posts.

 

[jeffnae]

Well i got them Im not going to name Members. There was only one message in my profile.. But on my friends there was more.
So once again Conclusions are jumped to without knowing all the facts. Ie friends account..
And i also am writing on behalf of another member. Not just me.

 

[ian]

but...is'nt that why you join a forum like this in the first place? To try and correct wrong doings, try and make sence of it all?. I do agree with the amount of people it should take to advise you that your stocking is wrong, or that people are overstocking as such and the way it is said. The one thing i have noticed though, is people don't take responsibitlity for thier wrong doings, someone else is always to blame, so what if the guy at the LFS advised you to do 'that'. When you come on here and it's suggested that it probably wasn't a good idea, do something about it rather than pushing blame on members here or taking no responsibility.

 

[jeffnae]

Some people I guess joined to find out what they are doing wrong and to get advice. I guess thats where people ask for help not be critised.

 

[bae1994]

so are you a existing member thats made a new account to have a moan n groan and it not effect your other accounts status?

also surely if you didnt join this forum to get advice and give advice youve only joined to argue???

 

[jeffnae]

No i dont have another account. only this one.

Never said that... I said a friend... Some people always jump to conclusions beofre finding out the facts.

I joined as i thought it was one of the better forums...

 

[bae1994]

well i didnt jump to a conclusion if you look at my post theres a question mark so it was a question not a conclusion!

 

[jeffnae]

I wasn't suggesting you jumped to conclusions!!


It doesnt matter what forum whether fish or car related for eg...
There is always some one to critique. In a good way or not so good way

I guess at the end of the day it is what makes our work better or worse As we worry what other people will think... I dont want to start anything, But i guess its to late for that.
I just wanted to Point out that sometimes facts and figures need to be asked first before many of us jump to conclusions..

Im sorry if i have offended anyone.I didnt intend to.
I just wanted to put out my point of view..

There will be people that agree and disagree with this topic.

 

[nessar]

The reason you would get so many people telling you to the same thing is because they agree, and generally if 5 people tell you the same thing, its very likely to be true.

I'm not trying to be rude, as I don't in fact know, but maybe they were telling you that you needed a bigger aquarium or better filtration because you did need it.

Yes LFS make money by selling you fish and advice, these people do not. So why would they try and steer you wrong? Yes the people on here can get a bit passionate about it and bicker over details, but the fact is they are really trying to help.

And thank you by the way, you've just reminded me to ask someone if my filtration is okay.

Sorry if that sounds like Im argueing, just trying to help you to understand.

 

[fishyfeet]

i disagree,

this is a forum, its not a helpline, or an advise page, theres lots of thoses on the web if you look, a forum is a mixed group of people all with different points of view, if i asked how to cycle my tank i would i expect get about six different sets of advice, some correct yet all different and some may be wrong. If you are told about something over and over, its cos those people all think that same advice and its probably correct. If you got one reply how would you know thats correct, people are giving you info on experiences they have had, at the end of the day you choose what you want to do. If you are silly enough to do something without researching the subject you may as many of us have found make a grave error but to let someone carry on not knowing that they are in for a fall, not to mention kill something when we could help prevent that. I can name numerous instantances in the past and only the other day for instance

Should i put cichlids in with my male betta,

i didnt mince my words, are you mad i think was my reply

another one was, i turn my filter off overnight to save electric, why are my fish ill??

and (a classic) this was a pm, ive brought an air stone, and put it in my tank, but it doesnt appear to be working, (hmmm what no pump or airline) let me see

now i know exactly what is wrong with all the above through experience and i think common sense but some people obviously have very little, i dont mean to be unkind but if i think you are nuts then i will say so, even if someone else has said it after all you posted on here to get some advice so dont moan.

 

[Assaye]

If you showed us a photo of an under-weight horses that had never been groomed and lived in a muddy field full of ragwort (toxic plant), you couldn't expect us to go "pretty pony, what is he called?". If it was a cat/dog/horse/child being treated in a manner that showed that the owner had very little knowledge and had done very little research, I'm sure you would agree that commenting, asking questions and trying to improve the situation would be appropriate.

However, people seem to assume that fish are so easy to care for and such a lovely ornament that they can do whatever they want. We try to be friendly and delicate when someone has 40 neon tetra in a 30 litre tank or has a silver shark in a 20 gallon, but ultimately the fish come first and anyone who truly cared about fish welfare would appreciate that we are only trying to help the animals.

If you just want people to go "awww", then don't come here. We all had to endure other members picking apart our tanks when we joined but we decided that learning from very experienced aquarists and improving the way we keep our fish is more important than getting annoyed that they didn't just appreciate our tanks.

I do think that people should ask enough to be sure that their critique is relevant. It would of course be silly to get upset that a "newbie" had some blue rams (because blue rams are hard to care for) only to find out that the water is perfect for them and that the owner has been breeding them for 30 years. However, when it is a case of clown loaches being kept in 3 foot tanks and 40 fish being kept in a Fluval edge, there isn't much the owner can say to excuse that other than "yeah, I know, I got mislead by my lfs" or "oh, I didn't know that". There are some things that you just don't do and no amount of "well, my fish are fine" makes it OK. We look after the animals and adapt to them, we don't put all the animals together and expect them to adapt to us.

 

[kaivalagi]

As already said a forum is a place for discussion and people are entitled to their opinions, it's not like it's paid for professional advice that you could expect to be delivered without any upset. I find if several members reply strongly with the same point on a subject then the advice can be taken with a degree of confidence, if members feel strongly about something then take it as that and not as a personal attack.

I agree that sometimes members can be passionate about what they are posting, and sometimes this can be received negatively, but have you actually had bad advice along with this "bad attitude"? I certainly haven't, I am very happy with the advice received, and without this forum I would have lots of misconceptions on the subject I am sure.

Some examples of what you are talking about would be good, it might be that something was explained to you wrong in the past or that you have understood something that could warrant a "oh my god" response...I'm not trying to defend anyone as I don't know the particulars of any discussions you are referring to.

And, don't forget, if you have a gripe with certain members responses being ridiculously over board and repeated then you can always bring it up with the moderators in private. It may warrant the removal of some posts that do not belong...?

I'd hope that you still feel you can ask questions on the forum when you get stuck or need advice, most of the replies you get will be positive I am sure. We all have something in common, our love for our fish.

 

[raptorrex]

Im fairly new to this forum. And it is probably not my place to say or do anything. But i have to now.
I would like to add some thing to this forum. Some people arent going to agree.
I dont mean to offend or critise anyone or there Efforts..


I have been just reading the forum lately and there is some thing that is really annoying me by others replies.
People add their tanks to this forum so others can appreciate. Where as other members we shall welcome these pictures and not critique them as much as members do. Some times comments are best left off.
I understand that the replies are in the Best interest of the fish. Advising members not Accusing them of basically not knowing anything and that other members are better than them.

When I first joined I recieved pm messages of people saying about What my fish like to eat or do or Who will go with my fish., Groups they shall be in. Bigger tank, Also to be told that i do not have sufficient Filteration. Or bascially not in my tank etc....
Which really P***** me off, These members new nothing about the circumstances of my fish tank, New nothing of me or of MY Fish.. When i replied with something they never replied again.

People are proud of there tanks and their stock only to be critised by others. In a Harsh way.
Our stock of our tanks is what we have been advised from by our LFS. Yes I agree that sometimes they dont tell us all the facts as they just want a sale.. But then it comes down to Research before you buy.. I know alot of members like to advise other members of situations that they have accountered or from what they have seen etc.

Do you think members need to be told by like 3 or more people the same thing... Post after post. Reply after Reply...

Basically to sumarise my post, Members needs to approach other members in a nicier way about the Possible tank situation. Not heavily CRUCIFY others.... Even find out all the facts before you jump to conclusions

I do feel for you. however its not the forum, or members at fault. if you feel the need for "back patting", this is not the place. its sad to some, but membership says it suites most.



I remember it was hard to be told you are a chump, because of your stock or fish handling. it might hurt, but it's, invariably, true.

 

[fishyfeet]

I do feel for you. however its not the forum, or members at fault. if you feel the need for "back patting", this is not the place. its sad to some, but membership says it suites most.

to be fair, if your are upset with Fishyfeet, i would look to yourself, for fault, not her. she is one of the most fair, and level headed here. if she felt it right to chide you. I'll stand by here every time.

I remember it was hard to be told you are a chump, because of your stock or fish handling. it might hurt, but it's, invariably, true.


Wasnt me, ive never replied to this members posts before that i can remember,
but i stand by what i said, i think of the fish and if that upsets anyone, sorry, but you asked.

Thanks for the vote of confidence rap, your welcome to a good pasteing off me anytime