Joke Of The Day

[brian1]

I went to hospital last week to have a mole removed from my backside.

The doctor said I'll be fine but the RSPCA said if I do it again I'll be prosecuted.

NEXT.........ANYONE!!

 

[blackops]

lol

 

[LucyB]

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Lean beef.

 

[DanTheFishMan11]

what do you call a fish with no eye


a fsh hahahaha has to be done by someone

 

[brian1]

lol...lucy..

I went to the doctors yesterday and said,I have twisted vallis and got cabomba of the tongue, he said, have you changed your water, I said yes, once every Wednesday..........he said, it sounds a bit fishy to me...........

 

[ShinySideUp]

What do you call a man covered in leaves -- Russell

What do you call a man covered in bird crap -- Cliff

What do you call a deer with no eyes -- No idea

What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs -- Still no idea

Some titles for books as yet unwritten:

Cat in the Bed by Claude Balls

Russian Fleas by Ivan Elavanich

Speak Like a Toff by Air Hair Lair

...and that's quite enough of that!

 

[basboi85]

What's the boundaries of the jokes though as being a ex squad I have a very dark/ sick sense of humor

 

[ShinySideUp]

What's the boundaries of the jokes though as being a ex squad I have a very dark/ sick sense of humor

Tell the joke then don't log in for a week, by then the furore will have died down! :saddam: sama:

Sorry, I've just found the extra emoticons, such fun.

 

[LucyB]

I wouldn't tell and dark/sick jokes on here if I were you.. This is a family forum and the mods will hunt you down.


Never thought i'd find a use for the 'ninja' emoticon...

 

[ShinySideUp]

I wouldn't tell and dark/sick jokes on here if I were you.. This is a family forum and the mods will hunt you down.


Never thought i'd find a use for the 'ninja' emoticon...

A likely story, you found the Ninja then scoured the forums for some way to use it I'll bet!! lol

 

[LucyB]

I wouldn't tell and dark/sick jokes on here if I were you.. This is a family forum and the mods will hunt you down.


Never thought i'd find a use for the 'ninja' emoticon...

A likely story, you found the Ninja then scoured the forums for some way to use it I'll bet!! lol

Bah! You got me...

 

[brian1]

I am passing this on to you because it definitely worked for me today, and we all could probably use more calm in our lives.. Some doctor on TV this morning said the way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started. So I looked around my house to see things I'd started and hadn't finished -I have managed to finish off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of Chardonnay, a bodle of Baileys, a butle of wum, a pockage of Prungles, tha mainder of bot Prozic and Valiuminun scriptins, the res of the chesescke an a box a chocletz. Yu haf no idr how bludy fablus I feel rite now, rgds bruin 1......I fink

 

[LucyB]

I am passing this on to you because it definitely worked for me today, and we all could probably use more calm in our lives.. Some doctor on TV this morning said the way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started. So I looked around my house to see things I'd started and hadn't finished -I have managed to finish off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of Chardonnay, a bodle of Baileys, a butle of wum, a pockage of Prungles, tha mainder of bot Prozic and Valiuminun scriptins, the res of the chesescke an a box a chocletz. Yu haf no idr how bludy fablus I feel rite now, rgds bruin 1......I fink

Made me giggle!

 

[Dieses Madchen]

What do you call a man covered in leaves -- Russell

What do you call a man covered in bird crap -- Cliff

Guy floating in the water - Bob

Laying in front of a door - Matt

Hanging on the wall - Art

In a hole - Phil

 

[the_lock_man]

Scottish dentist - Phill McCafferty