Gripe

[Synirr]

My mother wanted to get my 84 year old grandmother a betta in a bowl for Christmas. Grandmother already has a 10 gallon but she can't take care of it. The idea was that I could take grandmother's last remaining fish (most died, of course, all that's left is a dwarf gourami, a yo-yo loach, and possibly an oto or two) and she could could take care of a small bowl.

Now, while grandmother might be able to take care of a bowl, is it actually going to happen? No. Grandmother is not going to change the water once a week, or even once every two weeks... the fish would be lucky to be cleaned once a month. For this reason, I suggested getting a 5 gallon instead, so she could have a cycled tank with a betta and an ADF to watch.

My mother put up a fight. "But she won't be able to take care of that!"... as though she would have taken care of it even if she could
It finally came down to me saying, "Look, both you an I know it's not going to get taken care of no matter what size it is, so the question of tank size boils down to how long you want the fish to live."

I won and we bought a 5 gallon... at which point my mother said "Hey! We could just move her old fish into this smaller tank!!" (dwarf gouarmi, YO-YO LOACH, and otos, remember)
The only reply I made was "No."

Any of you have frustrating situations like this where you have trouble hammering into someone's head that fish actally need to be properly cared for? Our end plan is that I'm going to put some of my old filter media in grandmother's new tank so it'll be cloned, and use bottled water to fill it so nitrates will start out at approx. 0 and will thus take quite a while to build to unsafe levels. Sound good? It'll get 50% water changes about once a month

 

[soritan]

The sorts of assumptions non-fish-phile people make are sometimes scary.

A friend of mine wanted to get a crab for her betta's tank, so it could protect itself.

Often, people think of 'fish' as easy pets, when the truth tends to be the oppisite. Fish have more science, patience, and knowledge involved. Where as a cat can meow in your face, like, "feed me *040-ich!"

It's just one of those things that folks like yourself, and myself... who invest some measure in their pets welfare, have to deal with.

That doesn't stop it from being entirely depressing, at times.

On the bright side, if we nag enough, they will eventually give in to us unhealthily obsessed weirdos' opinions.

 

[Synirr]

On the bright side, if we nag enough, they will eventually give in to us unhealthily obsessed weirdos' opinions.

Haha, yeah. My mom gave in after I said "Well I know you don't care, but..." She's an animal lover too, so I guess that made her realise how stupid her idea was

 

[soritan]

Oh! the days I wish people wouldn't look at me like I wasn't some sort of loon.

-- and, Oh! the satisfaction when they come running to me for advice.


Petty as it may be, being right is oh so grand.

 

[Ben]

score!a free 10 gallon! Mantis Shrimp anyone?



Parents can be so frustrating sometimes, but just remember that you wouldn't have everything you have today if it wasnt for them

DD

 

[soritan]

My parents are TOO egear to buy me new things, come Christmas! I posted it on the 'chat' part of the forum, but I had this awful nightmare that they bought me 30 guppies.

They honestly don't intend to make your life misery.

It just often feels that way.

 

[Silvani]

Perhaps if you got some plants for the 5 gallon tank that you’re putting the betta in? You could get some really easy ones like Java Ferns. Then get a timer for the light. They sell timers at Target, and I’m sure other places. You could have it turn on at like 11am and go off at 4pm so that the plants get a few hours of light each day and it’s not something that your Grandmother has to remember. The plants would help keep the tank in better condition too.

 

[Ethos]

My cousin has a 10G with a salamander, a goldfish, a 5" common plec, 1 rosey barb tetra, 2 neons and another random tetra.
He doesn't listen to me...erg.

 

[Durbkat]

I had a VERY tough time to talk my grandmother to let me get my 55g and now the friend of the family that I am hoping will help me build a stand for the tank is complaining about how I shouldn't be spending money on myself and that I should use all my money to buy my mom, grandmother, him and his wife a present and I only spent a $180 to get it and I still have $45 to buy them presents. Now tommorow when he takes me shopping to get presents for my grandmother and mom I have to hear his mouth about how I shouldn't spend a dime on myself during christmas time. As time goes on it makes me wish I didn't get this 55g so I wouldn't have to hear peoples mouth just because I bought 1 thing out of the whole year for my self.

 

[Synirr]

score!a free 10 gallon! Mantis Shrimp anyone?

I need another 10 gallon like I need a hole in my head... I literally don't have a place to put one!!
I already have a 5 gallon set up for the future pico reef and mantis, but I need to build some kind of stand thing to hold the light hood before I can get things going... it ended up being too wide to sit on the tank once the filter was in place

Perhaps if you got some plants for the 5 gallon tank that you’re putting the betta in? You could get some really easy ones like Java Ferns.

Yep yep, that's the plan. Plants were the only things that kept any of her current fish alive. She had 3 dwarf gouramis, a yo-yo loach and three otos, all of which were actually living just fine until she thought the plant was overgrowing the tank and took THE WHOLE THING out. Way to go grandma, you removed the only thing keeping your water levels anywhere near liveable. That's when the die-offs began.

As time goes on it makes me wish I didn't get this 55g so I wouldn't have to hear peoples mouth just because I bought 1 thing out of the whole year for my self.

Haha... my birthday is November 29th, so I'm spending my B-day money all through the holiday season and no one has any right to say anything about it