Crazy Stories Thread

[OliveFish05]

My family rented a pontoon boat to celebrate the end of the summer last year. My brother brought a couple of his friends. We brought our float so we could go tubing, but couldn’t get the pontoon’s canopy down. (If you don’t know, you can’t go full speed with the canopy up, it will damage it) A piece was jammed, and we couldn’t unstuck it with our fingers. My mother grabbed a little rusty fishing knife we found on the boat and was able to wiggle the piece loose, but as soon as it loosened her hand slipped and the knife sliced a 3 inch gash on her hand. It started gushing blood and my brothers friends just about passed out. Their faces went all pale and they looked like they were about to gag. Meanwhile, my sisters and I started looking for a first aid kit on the boat while my dad examined the injury. It is funny, everybody is amazed that my sisters and I arent squeamish at all. We simply say “we’re doctors kids”. We found a first aid kit and some clean water bottles, so cleaned the wound, got the bleeding to stop, and put some bandaids on it. She made it the rest of the day, then stopped at urgent care to get stitches and a tetanus booster on the way home. It healed up nicely and she barely has a scar.

 

[WhistlingBadger]

My family rented a pontoon boat to celebrate the end of the summer last year. My older brother brought a couple of his friends. We brought our float so we could go tubing, but couldn’t get the pontoon’s canopy down. (If you don’t know, you can’t go full speed with the canopy up, it will damage it) A piece was jammed, and we couldn’t unstuck it with our fingers. My mother grabbed a little rusty fishing knife we found on the boat and was able to wiggle the piece loose, but as soon as it loosened her hand slipped and the knife sliced a 3 inch gash on her hand. It started gushing blood and my brothers friends just about passed out. Their faces went all pale and they looked like they were about to gag. Meanwhile, my sisters and I started looking for a first aid kit on the boat while my dad (who is an emergency physician) examined the injury. It is funny, everybody is amazed that my sisters and I arent squeamish at all. We simply say “we’re doctors kids”. We found a first aid kit and some clean water bottles, so cleaned the wound, got the bleeding to stop, and put some bandaids on it. She made it the rest of the day, then stopped at urgent care to get stitches and a tetanus booster.

Book 2

Once upon a time, some happy people lived next to a lake. Lakes are happy. Their boat hardly ever got its canopy stuck. And when it did, they carried our repairs in a responsible manner, using only the proper tools. They hardly ever used rusty fishing knives to remove jammed cotter pins or bolts. Thus they were nearly always able to carry out repairs without cutting huge, gushing slashes into their hands. Intact skin is happy. And they lived happily ever after.

The End

 

[CaptainBarnicles]

Once upon a time, there was a happy place. And in that happy place, there lived many happy people. And everyday, they got up and did happy things. They hardly ever broke things or cut themselves or set things on fire. Except sometimes they set logs on fire, in a responsible, carefully controlled manner, to keep themselves warm. Warmth is happy.

The End

Better?

Wow, your sarcasm astounds me

 

[CaptainBarnicles]

Book 2

Once upon a time, some happy people lived next to a lake. Lakes are happy. Their boat hardly ever got its canopy stuck. And when it did, they carried our repairs in a responsible manner, using only the proper tools. They hardly ever used rusty fishing knives to remove jammed cotter pins or bolts. Thus they were nearly always able to carry out repairs without cutting huge, gushing slashes into their hands. Intact skin is happy. And they lived happily ever after.

The End

Thats it, I'm not playing anymore

 

[WhistlingBadger]

Wow, your sarcasm astounds me

Wasn't trying to be snarky; just having some fun. I get a little goofy by this time of the week. Something to do with all these crazy children that surround me all day. Have a great (and very happy) weekend.

 

[CaptainBarnicles]

Wasn't trying to be snarky; just having some fun. I get a little goofy by this time of the week. Something to do with all these crazy children that surround me all day. Have a great (and very happy) weekend.

well....I suppose you're forgiven then ❤

 

[Uberhoust]

This thread confuses me. Without non verbal clues it is real difficult to assess the intent of some comments.

 

[CaptainBarnicles]

This thread confuses me. Without non verbal clues it is real difficult to assess the intent of some comments.

I think by getting to know the tone and humour of members you kind of get the gist...I knew WB was kidding and thought I'd play along I love him really

 

[WhistlingBadger]

I think by getting to know the tone and humour of members you kind of get the gist...I knew WB was kidding and thought I'd play along I love him really

In a platonic sense, I hope...This is so sudden...we hardly know each other...

 

[CaptainBarnicles]

In a platonic sense, I hope...This is so sudden...we hardly know each other...

It must be that cantankerous badgerness of yours, you know how it is, treat em mean keep em keen and all that a Captain can't resist a good whistle!

 

[Rocky998]

My family rented a pontoon boat to celebrate the end of the summer last year. My older brother brought a couple of his friends. We brought our float so we could go tubing, but couldn’t get the pontoon’s canopy down. (If you don’t know, you can’t go full speed with the canopy up, it will damage it) A piece was jammed, and we couldn’t unstuck it with our fingers. My mother grabbed a little rusty fishing knife we found on the boat and was able to wiggle the piece loose, but as soon as it loosened her hand slipped and the knife sliced a 3 inch gash on her hand. It started gushing blood and my brothers friends just about passed out. Their faces went all pale and they looked like they were about to gag. Meanwhile, my sisters and I started looking for a first aid kit on the boat while my dad (who is an emergency physician) examined the injury. It is funny, everybody is amazed that my sisters and I arent squeamish at all. We simply say “we’re doctors kids”. We found a first aid kit and some clean water bottles, so cleaned the wound, got the bleeding to stop, and put some bandaids on it. She made it the rest of the day, then stopped at urgent care to get stitches and a tetanus booster on the way home. It healed up nicely and she barely has a scar.

Ahhh how stereo types can be so wrong... I love it!

 

[connorlindeman]

So here's something that happened to me about a year ago.

I was working on getting my church's phone to forward to another line that could be answered from home.
After I got it set up I wanted to test it.
I called my church's number on my phone and I didn't hear it ring. I waited for a second and suddenly I heard two voices talking.

Voice 1: "so are you sure he's dead?"
Voice 2: "yeah I'm sure"
Voice 1: "OK. Write the note now. They ask fewer questions if you write the note."
Voice 2: "OK"

Then I made a noise and the phone disconnected.
Strange right?

 

[Rocky998]

So here's something that happened to me about a year ago.

I was working on getting my church's phone to forward to another line that could be answered from home.
After I got it set up I wanted to test it.
I called my church's number on my phone and I didn't hear it ring. I waited for a second and suddenly I heard two voices talking.

Voice 1: "so are you sure he's dead?"
Voice 2: "yeah I'm sure"
Voice 1: "OK. Write the note now. They ask fewer questions if you write the note."
Voice 2: "OK"

Then I made a noise and the phone disconnected.
Strange right?

Uhhhhmmm... Kinda sus... Sounds like it's a cover up...

Seriously crazy though... Did you report that call to anyone?

 

[CaptainBarnicles]

So here's something that happened to me about a year ago.

I was working on getting my church's phone to forward to another line that could be answered from home.
After I got it set up I wanted to test it.
I called my church's number on my phone and I didn't hear it ring. I waited for a second and suddenly I heard two voices talking.

Voice 1: "so are you sure he's dead?"
Voice 2: "yeah I'm sure"
Voice 1: "OK. Write the note now. They ask fewer questions if you write the note."
Voice 2: "OK"

Then I made a noise and the phone disconnected.
Strange right?

Erm...that's well dodge. I hope you reported it!

 

[Rocky998]

Erm...that's well dodge. I hope you reported it!

It's either a murder covered up with suicide or a really messed up prank