Not too sure what you mean by "stress". Ideally, the female will have a large, round abdomen, a prominant ovipositor at the bottom of her abdomen and show verticle bars. She will often adopt a "head down" position which shows her readiness to breed.
Both male and often the female will flare at each other...the male will do the most flaring and this should encourage him to reincorce his nest, not hinder it in any way. It's what's supposed to happen.
Good luck
Andy
