If I understand correctly, you are saying that sand abrasiveness is the most important factor in sand quality, do you also mean the presence of organic matter can be detrimental? Most sands are mined onshore, offshore or river source. Most if not all play sands/joint sands in NZ are river mined. These rivers are habitat to many native bullies, galaxias, possibly torrent fish, etc... What does it matter to fish occurring similar river environments who may encounter such, heavier fine sand? Even if the sand may be slightly coarser than in their original environment how different would the results be?
In what way is all black sand 'not good for the fish'? I have iron sand in one of my tanks and IME the odessa barbs show some stunning colours over it. Isn't it just a matter of opinion?