Aggression and expression

[Bloo]

Over the past number of months, I’ve noticed the poor language and expression here in the Betta section (almost exclusively). Words like "kill him, smack, hit in the face, rip his face off" – stuff like that. Why all this aggression ? There are ways and means of saying things and the above seems excessively aggressive to me.

Yes perhaps it’s different forms of expression and continental differences, but is that sort of violent language really necessary ?
I really do not want an argument or instigate one – I’m just saying that this is supposed to be “the friendliest forum around”, but sometimes I have to wonder.

 

[willtang3000]

I adgree theres so much violence in this section one time i remember this guy not naming names but he actually gambled on bettas fighting

 

[GSD]

i do agre with you but i dont think it is limited to the betta section

 

[Bloo]

i do agre with you but i dont think it is limited to the betta section

Thanks but note that I said "almost exclusively" - i.e. not limited, but to a great extent lol

 

[GSD]

yeah i think most of them are in the betta section becasue of walmart threads!

 

[Andie]

lol the Walmart thing probably has a lot to do with it, but I know what you mean. I've seen some pretty violent comments as well, and some of them kinda surprised me, but to be fair I can also understand it, at least to an extent. If you've got any familiarity with abuse of anything helpless than I think you tend to fly off the handle a bit easier at even the suggestion of something similar; I can certainly be the same way.

Of course, if anybody has any experience with something like breed rescue, then you'll know how one dead puppy rotting in a pile of its mother's feces too many can turn even the sweetest little lady into a raging volcano of justice. Or something similarly unlikely But yeah. In summation: I've noticed it, I don't condone it, but I can understand it.

 

[Kiarra]

I've noticed it, as well. I find it disconcerting. I think a large part of it is due to the rather...overzealousness...of some of the youth. (Yes, I am young at 19, but my posts are not harsh, aggressive, violent in nature, or cruel.) It is wonderful that people feel passionately about Bettas, and about the care and protection of Bettas from those who may do them harm. But I do not condone the overly aggressive responses from many members, and fully support any action taken by moderators against these hostile verbal displays. There is no reason for it. To quote the old cliche, you really do catch more flies with sugar than with vinegar. I find that speaking calmly and reasonably, and explaining your position well, without resulting to bashing or hostility, gets much, much better results. Aggression is merely met with more aggression, which escalates into utter verbal fights very quickly, and neither side really ever bothers listening to each other when it gets like that.

A debate is one thing, where each side is clearly explained and no one calls anyone else names, or threatens them violence. But so many threads have degenerated lately into verbal fights.

 

[Synirr]

Like fish like owner, I guess
I didn't notice the language used as much as the general lack of tolerance and understanding. Seems like we really enjoy jumping to conclusions and assuming the worst on this forum

 

[Ethos]

I never really noticed any language....maybe its because I havn't been here long enough?
Hmhmph.
B)

 

[FishEnthusiast]

I've noticed it, as well. I find it disconcerting. I think a large part of it is due to the rather...overzealousness...of some of the youth.

I have to agree with this statement. I am not that old yet that I don't remember being young and, to put it politely, overzealous. In my years of growing up I learned 2 things,

1. No matter how badly I want it to be true, I really don't know everything, in fact I know very little

2. Respect is received when respect is given.

Yes we love our animals, and yes, we probably treat our bettas better than a lot of betta owners. However, that doesn't mean that anyone who doesn't do it our way is wrong, nor does it mean we should bash them.

 

[Bloo]

Thanks, I'm glad that I'm not alone in thinking it's entirely unecesary (way of expression). Hey heck, I've dealt with cruelty galore working in rescue shelters and seeing animals fighting for life due to extreme neclect - with the only outcome euthenasia because they were so far gone. And it would have been unfair to prolong their agony.

But I strongly believe that passion is one thing and the way in which we deal with it (and express yourself) is another. I too find it disconcerting probably because I never ever used those words and to me visualizing "ripping someones face off" is just too shocking to even contemplate. And as Kiarra said “Aggression is merely met with more aggression".

Anyway, I'll leave it at that

 

[OohFeeshy]

I think a large part of it is due to the rather...overzealousness...of some of the youth. (Yes, I am young at 19, but my posts are not harsh, aggressive, violent in nature, or cruel.)

Hey, I'm 14 and I'm not violent And don't argue or I'll bash your teeth in LOL I haven't really noticed it TBH.

 

[MegTheFish]

Yah!!! I'm 14...and...ermm...do you think I'm rude? I don't really know if I am or not I know I've pissed some people off...but...they deserved it!!!

 

[GSD]

im only 13............a wonder if im the youngest here
anyway im 14 in august so
lol

 

[FishEnthusiast]

It isn't all the youth, believe me. I didn't realize some of you were so young. Please take that as a compliment. The way you carry yourself online says a lot about your maturity level. I was surprised to find out Kiarra was only 19, and Oohfeeshy, I had no idea you were only 14. I am very impressed. Same with Meg and German, your posts do not reflect the number attached to your age. There are people here, however, that are very young and very passionate, and it shows in their posts. That is not necessarily a bad thing, as you are only young once, and at least they are passionate about a fish and not illegal drugs, or crime. Keep up the good work members, young and old(er).