Pet's Diaries

[Miss Wiggle]

A Dog's Diary
 
7 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favourite!
8 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favourite!  
9 am - Oh boy! The kids! My favourite!
Noon - Oh boy! The garden! My favourite!
2 pm - Oh boy! A car ride! My favourite!
3 pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favourite!
4 pm - Oh boy! Playing fetch! My favourite!
6 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Mum! My favourite!  
7 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Dad! My favourite!
8 pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favourite!
9 pm - Oh boy! Tummy rubs on the couch! My favourite!
11 pm - Oh boy! Sleeping in my people's bed! My favourite!
 



A Cat's Diary
Day 183 of my captivity.
My captors continued to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.  
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal.
The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild
satisfaction I get from clawing the furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another house plant.  
Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while
they were walking almost succeeded. Maybe I should try this at the top of
the stairs.
In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again  
induced myself to vomit on their favourite chair. I must try this on their
bed.
Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to
make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into  
their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little kitty cat
I was. This is not working according to plan.
There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in
solitary confinement throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise  
and smell the food. More important, I overheard that my confinement was
due to my powers of inducing something called "allergies." Must learn what
this is and how to use it to my advantage.
I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches.  
The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return.
He is obviously a half-wit.
The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant. He speaks with
them regularly, and I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his  
current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait.
It's only a matter of time.

 

[stang1]

 

[catxx]

hahaha

strangely accurate to my cat though.
especially the mouse part!

 

[starrynightxxi]

same here. my friend's cat leaves skinned, decapitated mice in his pants

 

[stang1]

same here. my friend's cat leaves skinned, decapitated mice in his pants

What a lovely place to leave them!

 

[Naughtygirlrlw]

That was THE BEST!!! I actually LOL'd!

 

[Leopard-danio]

LOL that describes my nanas cats except they wouldn't think like that as they are a bit silly...sooo silly infact that they fall off fences and dance off a little table, in an attempt to scrounge food hehe silly kitties, oh n the protests are erm...vomiting on my mums skirt rofl that was funny, quiet a genious for a silly kitty.

 

[pica_nuttalli]

you forgot the part where the cat widdles on the sofa